My father-in-law told me this morning at breakfast that he was dreaming about chocolate pudding. This is his way of asking me to get him some. I did one better: I made it for him from scratch. It called for 1oz of baking chocolate…I did one better: I made it with some of my leftover bar of Scharffen Burger 82% chocolate. He LOVED it.
I had absolutely no desire to sample any of the chocolate as I pulled it out of its package or even as it melted in the double boiler. I did sample the pudding…but really only to see how it tasted (and yes, I nailed it, if I do say so myself). I really do think the spell has been broken!
Frank asked me yesterday how I was planning on proceeding after my 30-days were up. I told him I won’t eat chocolate unless it’s in a dessert that we have at someone’s house or the rare occasion at a restaurant. Same with coffee and tea. I will only drink decaff (except for my morning latte…which is becoming too much for me...I’m going to move to 50/50 for awhile to see how that feels). I will not use chocolate, coffee, or tea as a pick-me-up. Or anything else for that matter. Over these last 23 days, I have gone from low energy to more normal energy flows. Meaning sometimes it’s high, sometimes it’s medium, and sometimes it’s low. Natural, with natural rhythms. And I LOVE it. I will not abuse my body, mind, and spirit again by altering my wonderful, natural energy.
As I approach the end of my 30-days of being with my natural energy, I am wondering what I should work on next, since this has been so successful and enlightening. Many of my shadows are raising their hands, asking to be healed, like losing weight, getting in shape, exploring the sources of my newly found anger and angst. But those all feel like “have-tos”. After I take a few weeks off from the intenseness of daily intention and blogging (and I realize that I totally missed writing my blog yesterday), I’m going to break my habit of having ice cream after dinner. Sounds so tepid and meaningless, but it’s important because, believe it or not, I’m practically a vegan. But my father-in-law likes his reduced-fat, sugar-free vanilla ice cream every night and he doesn’t like to eat it rock hard. So, I warm it up in the microwave for a several seconds until it comes out like soft ice cream. OMG, do you know how yummy that is???
Okay, it’s a done deal: I will give up my habit of eating ice cream to honor all the cows who suffer the abuses of factory farming by being milked every day of their lives – in quantities that well exceed what they would naturally produce – even while pregnant, and have to suffer the agony of having their annual calf torn away from them in infancy. Matter of fact, I’m getting sloppy with my cheese too (we never even had these things in the house when it was just Frank and me). I’m going to break that habit as well. I’m getting lazy by using cheese as a quick source of protein. It’s just not humane to eat milk products these days…even organic.
But why wait to be more humane? I should start IMMEDIATLEY. I am starting immediately! Cows of the world, I am sorry I have contributed to your pain and suffering. I will no longer do you any harm. You are absolutely worthy of love, compassion, and respect right now, not when it’s convenient for me. Please forgive my unconsciousness and selfishness. I will do you no harm.